It has been a long time, very nearly 1 whole month, eeeek! I get shivers down my back just thinking about it. Do you ever fall into a non blogging, non creative spell where no matter what you do, you just can’t get out of? That is how I spent my past month and let me tell you, it has not been fun.
Christmas is my most favorite time of year (as I might have mentioned in the past.. might) and so it has been extra devastating to spend my December moaning about in a dark corner. And if extra devastating is an expression, than you can be sure I experienced it.
Going into major detail and bathing in self pity is not my goal with this post, my goal will be to share my solutions for a rainy day that might have lasted a month. But before I tell you, I will explain briefly, in case some of you might relate and I think it will also help me let go of the sad bits. I do find it helpful to write down my problems, it sort of puts a full stop to the grey areas and you can literally start tomorrow on a new page. Riiiiiight? 😀
From having a grand family disaster (no, not your usual Christmas day family row that will be over in an hour. This was nasty, and dangerous and something that has been brewing for 3 years). It overshadowed the whole of December and has put me in a place that I don’t wish any of my enemies to visit. To having my November technological meltdown continue; no computer, no phone, no camera… no distractions what-so-ever. I wasn’t able to clamber out of this mindset for over a month. No matter what anybody did, not Ronan, not my Christmas presents, no activities, not several beauty nights could drag me out of this. From feeling so sad for weeks, I went into feeling nothing, I wasn’t happy but I wasn’t sad either. I just was, and nothing could entertain me, like some big depressed rock at the bottom of the sea. That’s exactly how I felt. But I’m not prone to depression so what was it? As an impatient person who always wants everything to be done yesterday, I often refuse to believe things take time. And some things take a LONG time.
And a negative event of such extent, especially if it’s family related will run it’s coarse and I just had to wait until time did her magic healing.
So what do you do when life hits you hard, especially during the very month that you have been waiting for all year, a time that should strictly be for love and happiness?
Don’t rush. Don’t be like me and expect things to turn around over night. Because they won’t, and you will only wake up even more disappointed than ever. “Another crappy day, great”. You will end up thinking that there is something wrong with YOU, that it’s your fault you can’t get over things ASAP, and the last thing you need is self hatred right now. Accept that it is OK to feel shitty from time to time, and that bad things happen. If you accept this, than it will be much easier to deal with your situation, whatever it may be.
Only do things that make you happy. So you wanna watch 2 films a day or read that book to escape or only spend time with your dog? As long as it makes you happy it is okay. And don’t think any of it is a waste of time, if your favorite thing to do is categorized as a pastime. If it makes you happy, it is never a waste of time. And this is an advice I would give to everybody, happy or not; Do more of what makes you happy. Please, please, please do!
Do some physical exercize. I know this may not float everybody’s boat guys, but it reeeeally helps I swear! It doesn’t have to be crazy, lifting 200 kg bars over your head like Arnie. You can go swimming, or walking your dog, running, doing some yoga at home, dancing… Anything that sounds a little bit fun to you will be the one. Your mind will switch off for the duration of the exercise and instead of constantly thinking about your current situation, you can have an hour or so of quiet thoughts, which will be extremely handy. You will feel like you had a moments of “brain erase”. Never mind the whole endorphin levels (your happy hormone!!!!) rocketing to sky high due to physical exercise. It’s worth it!
Remember: It will take time. Literally, point one again. But this is the most important one. If you don’t do the things that make you happy or don’t go running right tomorrow at the crack of dawn… PLEASE don’t feel like you have failed yourself. Be patient with yourself. It’s what you’d tell a friend right? You’d tell them to be patient and that it’s okay. So do tell that to yourself too! Things take time. I should write that on my mirror, the amount of time I forget it. If I had a superhero power, it would definitely be to control time! 🙂
So, how was YOUR Christmas? Was it happy or cringey or full of love or Grinch-filled?
It feels great to be back to the thing that makes me happy, writing and sharing, even though my Blogmas resolutions have failed miserably. But you know, life happened. I do have one more point to add to those “remedies” as most of the words I have just written came form them;
Spend time with your loved ones. The ones that really understand and support you. You may feel like hiding away by yourself and so did I, but do take time for the special people. More than often (I mean, ALWAYS) they will have some wise and supportive answer for you and you will definitely feel better after being with them. Toooootally 🙂